How long can it last?
by hitomi129
Summary: how do you choose ? is it always that easy ? is it selfish to sacrifice to people you love?......find out on CHAPTER 4!
1. the face behind the mask

**HI there! Hitomi desu……as you all know this is my first fic…so if you don't like then stop reading it…okay!**

**And by the way…..**

_**I don't own Gundam seed nor Destiny okay!!!**_

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_Two yrs. After the battle in Messiah_

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_ORB……_

"_Just a little bit more……" she whispered to herself. "I little bit more time and I'll surely have my revenge……" Cagalli said to herself while reminiscing the past as she was staring at a picture, secretly kept on her drawer for 5 yrs now. This was taken when she was only fifteen with a guy and were both smiling with pure bliss. Repeatedly, these were the same words that were uttered by her until….._

"_CAGALLI!!", kisaka called to her_

"_Oh! Kisaka!", Cagalli replied to him in a very daughter like manner. The only difference was, the lonely and vengeful face she has when she was alone because of the burden in heart was now concealed in a pretentious way so that anyone who will see her will think that she was "Cagalli". The boyish but kind Cagalli that everyone met especially Athrun._

"_What are you doing, don't you know were going to be late for the shuttle to PLANTS?" Kisaka asked her as if she was a suspect for a crime. But then she quickly put on a pretentious face and sweetly said, " don't worry, its nothing I'm just nervous that's all! Sorry to keep you waiting" as she looked at him eye to eye showing her sincerity and with just a snap, Kisaka believed her._

"_Okay then……" kisaka released a sigh_

_Let's go to PLANTS…_

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_PLANTS……_

_Zala manor…7:00 pm_

" _Lastly, chairman Zala you'll be having a meeting with the representative of ORB tom. At exactly 2 pm sharp. A new treaty will be discussed and certain officials will also be there, fortunately that's all in your schedule for tom. Goodbye sir…". And from that Athrun Zala , the newly appointed chairman of PLANTS hung up to the phone after his secretary summed up his schedule for tom. But the thought of the meeting doesn't end there, he started to be anxious now. Thinking , he kept on thinking but suddenly realized that after two years being apart his mind wasn't about the meeting but straightly directed on a certain blond……a blond that he wasn't able to forget…the one with the name…CA.._

"_Mister Zala" A loud knock came through the door. "Someone wishes to see you downstairs",_

_His maid informed him. And with a interrupted mind, he quickly rushed downstairs. _

"_Say, who could that be?"_

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_**ON one of PLANTS hotels……**_

"_Please enjoy your stay……" _

_As the hotel guide closed the door, Cagalli began to unpack her things her make-up, clothing line and high hills. This were the things that came out on her luggage because for the past years of plotting out her plan she felt like she doesn't need those clothes anymore and she just wanted to " return back" to herself before. She wanted to wear them and appear before "him". Him and only him……_

_She felt she wanted to turn back time. "I just want to be with you……" now, she started to cry. Grasping the sheet of her clothes just to release the pain brought by the memories, the memories that showed hoe weak she is sacrificing herself just for the sake of ORB……"It's always for ORB……that cursed place……" she muttered with angry eyes face of great hatred for ORB and especially for the person responsible for her burden and sorrow._

"_I'll make him and his bloodline suffer for what I felt"_

_---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------__**Zala Manor…**_

"_Hey Athrun!! What's up?" Dearka suddenly greeted Athrun halfway of the staircase. Athrun was startled by his greeting but suddenly realized " Dearka aren't you suppose to be with Yzak?". Dearka released a heavy sigh on his comment " Oh! Give me break ! that guy is starting to act as my mother and now your trying to boss as a father!?"_

_Athrun didn't really expect him to visit him aside from the fact that he comes often to his house just to talk about his trip down at earth to spend time courting mirillia , It intrigued him. "why did you come here? Is it about Miriallia again? How many times have I told you that-", he was suddenly cut By Dearka and said while patting his back, " and I thought you were smart…its not about MY girl its about YOURS"_

_Athrun rushed down with excitement for he expected that person based on what Dearka said was her , the one he wants to see for this past two years. He felt his blood rush up and butterflies began to be felt on her stomach. His heart was beating fast now and despite being a coordinator , his brain stopped thinking for a moment……_

_But then……_

"_its nice to see you again, Ca-", Athrun said before appearing due to his excitement_

"_ME……meyrin???"_

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_So that's it for now , it's already midnight so I'm going to sleep now okay…………whether you like it or not send me a review after reading so that I would know if should continue it…okay! Thanks a lot_

_I'LL UPDATE SOON………………………_


	2. the prisoners of the past

_**Again greetings to you all!!!!... I said I'll update soon….so sorry if I'm not going to change the font now…but I'll change it next time okay!!...so before you read this chapter…..**_

_**Always remember and never ever forget that …….**_

_**I don't own Gundam seed…neither destiny**_

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_**Last chapter……**_

_**Athrun rushed down with excitement for he expected that person based on what Dearka said was her , the one he wants to see for this past two years. He felt his blood rush up and butterflies began to be felt on her stomach. His heart was beating fast now and despite being a coordinator , his brain stopped thinking for a moment……**_

_**But then……**_

"_**its nice to see you again, Ca-", Athrun said before appearing due to his excitement**_

"_**ME……meyrin???"**_

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_Athrun couldn't believe his eyes. The person in front of him wasn't blond with eyes of fury but a shy red head lady, Meyrin Hawke his FIANCE'. Along with her, came Kira, Lacus , Shinn and the flirty , overprotective sister , lunamaria._

" _Meyrin, what are you doing here?" Athrun asked her as if he doesn't even want to see her at all. His tone for inquiring was a bit of a shock for everyone. Athrun wasn't like when asking isn't he?. He is a kind and loving person but then for the first time he talked like a delinquent and to whom specifically? To his fiancé._

_Silence rendered on the manor because of the green –eyed man's intriguing action lately but then thanks to Dearka……_

"_hey! Don't be like that we were just late" , Dearka tried to cover him up as he out his arm on Athrun's shoulder and putting on a smile to his companions. " oh! Your maybe tired of all the work , were sorry if we disturbed you….", Lacus added. " no , actually I'm grateful" , Athrun replied after he saw Meyrin disappointed face." It's not like I don't miss her…I'm sorry" , Athrun continued._

_As soon as those words reached Meyrin's ears she quickly made a run for it to reach Athrun and hug him tight. Her hug was full of happiness and possessiveness that caused Athrun to step backwards because of the sudden pressure brought by the embrace. " oh! Athrun I missed you a lot" Meyrin said while hugging. Now, Athrun was having the mixed feeling of pity and disgust, he knows that from the start asking her to marry him was the biggest mistake of his life. He never wanted it to be that way but since she was the only one who cared for him when he went back to PLANTS , he couldn't take the risk of losing another after the other just like what happened to him and you know who……_

_But now , that things have went there ways , he knows he has to accept the responsibility due to his actions even though the perfect line to describe it is " suffering the consequences"._

_Meyrin's hug was now taking too long so Kira took the responsibility of doing a coughing gesture just for her to take notice of what she is doing , and it worked!. Upon hearing it meyrin quickly went back to her senses and released Athrun. She was disgusted to herself at first but when she looked and saw Athrun smiling at her , all of her feelings went down to the drain leaving only happiness and satisfaction brought by the thought that Athrun and her are romantically involved._

" _Athrun" kira , his friend that also decided to live in PLANTS, greeted him. "hi Athrun , its been a long time" luna interrupted. "yeah I haven't seen you for so long" Athrun replied. "hmmmm…actually I'm quite jealous of my sister , being able to see Athrun all the time" luna said pouting her lips causing shinn to be shocked "LUNA!!". Lunamaria laughed at Shinn , she meant for that as a joke but Shinn took it seriously. "oh shinn you know its's just a joke and perhaps , I ONLY LIKE YOU" after luna said those words they looked at each other with sweeteness not noticing the people looking at them until……_

"_okay why don't we go upstairs and have coffee shall we , I think Athrun won't mind!" Dearka interrupted and shocked the couple. "ye..yeah let's have coffee" Shinn said with a blushing face. And as soon as Athrun agreed they all went to the living room upstairs to continue their talks._

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_Zala Manor living room_

_The guests were all talking and having fun with their conversation, kira, lacus, shinn , lunamaria , meyrin…….and Dearka but not Athrun , He started to feel that the words and the whole conversation were not even sinking down on him until someone…"Athrun?" meyrin muttered "are you alright?" she asked with a heart full of concern. Of course with that kind type of gesture he can't just say the truth, he can't just say that he's still thinking of Cagalli and the meeting with her , so instead he released a heartfelt smile towards her and said , "yeah! I just need to go to the bathroom". "o..okay, just come back quickly okay!" after Lacus' words came from her lips , Athrun stood up to get out of the crowd not noticing that Dearka followed him from behind._

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_Bathroom ……_

_Athrun splashed water on his face. He thought these could cool his senses from all his burdens and especially from Cagalli. Facing the mirror, he saw himself and quickly felt anger in his heart for the man he saw in the mirror was incomplete and unsatisfied. He knew very well what he wanted most but still , he also knew that he wouldn't be able to get it , not in this circumstances that he's in right now. Looking at himself, he released a deep sigh and said "c'mon Athrun pull yourself together, would you!". _

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_PLANT's hotel_

_Cagalli is sweating all over , her body is trembling , her hands were crouching every where on the sheets of the bed and the hardest part was…she wasn't awake, she was having a night mare , a nightmare brought by the most painful moment of her life……_

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_**Cagalli's dream**_

"_Lord Uzumi, please stop!!" a Mirna said, trying to stop Cagalli's father _

"_Don't stop me, how dare she direct herself against my rules"…lord Uzumi said rushing through Cagalli's room._

_And as soon as lord Uzumi opened the door.._

_Cagalli noticed it and tried to greet him but…_

"_father-" Cagalli was shocked _

"_how dare you see that man , I told you not to see him didn't I?" Lord Uzumi said enraged after he slapped his daughter directly on the face_

" _Cagalli" the maid felt sorry for her for she was still shocked from what happened_

" _but father I-" Cagalli was again cut of by a slap on the other side of her cheek_

"_Lord Uzumi!!!" Mirna panicked_

"_how dare you see that man , after I told to forget about him!!!" Cagalli's father said with a trembling body due to anger _

"_fa..aaath…e..eerr" Cagalli called as she felt Uzumi hand crouching on her neck_

_The walls continued to show the shadow of Cagalli being battered by her own father_

_The maid tried to stop him but ended up being pushed aside_

" _I won't and I will never accept your child" lord Uzumi said as he continues slap her , punched and stop her breathing by crouching on his hand on her neck_

"_I'…m so..rry", Cagalli said while deep in tears as she felt blood rush down to her thighs down to her feet_

_Lord Uzumi's face changed from enraged to sadness after realizing what he was doing to his own daughter as he saw her body's bruises which were caused by him._

_But Cagalli's body couldn't bear the pain anymore especially the pain of losing her own…infant. Her senses stopped working as she felt the world stop before her and before she knew it……_

"_Cagalli!!!!!!" Myrna shouted as she saw Cagalli's body lie on the floor_

"_Somebody call the doctor , the princess fainted!!!!" she continued to shout for help_

"_Cagalli!!!!" Lord Uzumi tried to wake her up_

"_CAGALLI"_

"_CAGALLI"_

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_**Back to reality**_

"_CAGALLI" kisaka was tried to wake Cagalli up_

"_!!!" Cagalli quickly rised up trembling , chasing her breath. This worried kisaka so much and asked her, "are you okay?. But this remained unanswered as Cagalli asked kisaka the time. " it's only seven thirty , you said you wanted to have a nap due to your jetlag but you overslept" kisaka answered. Kisaka was still worried so he stood and tried to ask help to Erika but…. " I'm okay now , no need to get worried.." Cagalli gave him a sweet smile and thanked him. "I think I was just anxious about the meeting , …I'm sorry if a startled you" Cagalli continued saying her lies , for she perfectly knew that the meeting is a stepping stone for all her "plans". Her lies always works on anyone , these were the ones that made her reach the fulfillment of her plans from the very beginning until now. Of course it worked on kisaka , as Cagalli watched him go out and close the door._

_Once again Cagalli was alone, she lousily laid back on the bed and put her left wrist on her eyes to cover the tears that was now running down to her cheeks. But it was an insane act for she is laughing while in tears. She laughed , laughed and laughed sarcastically disgusted to herself , as her eyes continue to show her true emotions by releasing tears from her amber orbs. She gently touched her stomach using her right hand and then she said to herself………_

"_Lies, what a perfect way to compliment everyone" as she continued to laugh sarcastically._

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_So here's my update hope you like it!!...thank you also for the reviews…it sure motivated me a lot ……pls. continue to RR (read and review) okay……and if you like it..i'll update soon again just tell what you think about my fic…..thanks a lot guyzzzzz….._


	3. the shadows in my memory

**Hi there guyzzz….. I ' m back with chapter 3 ……. For the recent reviews..thank you and don't worry this is still an ASUCAGA fic but since this storyline was set after Gundam seed and Gundam seed destiny ….so I'm planning to have the romantic moments at the later chapters…. Pls have patience ..**

" _**I don't own Gundam seed not Gundam seed destiny" **_

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_Last chapter……(chapter 2)_

_Once again Cagalli was alone, she lousily laid back on the bed and put her left wrist on her eyes to cover the tears that was now running down to her cheeks. But it was an insane act for she is laughing while in tears. She laughed , laughed and laughed sarcastically disgusted to herself , as her eyes continue to show her true emotions by releasing tears from her amber orbs. She gently touched her stomach using her right hand and then she said to herself………_

"_Lies, what a perfect way to compliment everyone" as she continued to laugh sarcastically._

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_**ZALA manor**_

_At the hallway……_

_Athrun was not himself. He doesn't even know why but he feels as if he wants to go somewhere. A place where he can see her , a place where there's Athrun and her. He was now staring blankly into space as he leaned his back on the outside of the bathroom door. And then someone….._

"_Care to join me?!" Athrun was startled about the sudden question as he sees Dearka carrying a bottle of wine and offering it to him. He walked nearer to Athrun and said "I knew you'd be here……this wine was offered to me by a wine seller. He said I should drink it with a company for wine drinking without a buddy is tasteless…" Dearka was pulling up a story again it wasn't just for the wine that he wants to talk to Athrun and Athrun was very aware of it so he complied as he raised his head and smiled to him like he was signaling him that he knows what he wants despite not being what the subject matter is._

_**At the balcony….**_

" _hmmm…this wine really smells good , don't you think so Athrun?" , Dearka inquired him. Athrun can't help but look at him and release a deep sigh._

"_I know your not stupid , spill it out Dearka" Athrun replied to him as begin to position himself to sit on the railings of the balcony. Now, they were facing the opposite direction. Dearka who was leaning on the baluster by using his arms and Athrun sitting beside Dearka on the same railing that he depended on._

_Dearka took a glimpse of him with his eyes different as we always see. His orbs were very serious at the moment knowing that there was something wrong , not with him but with the man sitting beside him on the railings._

_As silence still continues between the two people…Athrun thought it was forever but.._

" _you know……even if you meet __**her**__…it won't matter anymore" Dearka was now starting to talk in a dead tone. He was talking about something hopeless. It was rare for Athrun to hear him talk that way but upon hearing those words , he finally realized __**who **__the subject was._

"…_even if you look at her, she won't look at you with sincerity. If you'll call her by name , it was expected she'll ignore you and no matter how great your love is for her , she won't love back anymore…" Dearka explained it to him._

_Athrun was completely speechless. He can't find the words to answer back because he, himself knows that it was true and upon opening his mouth " I know…." Was the only words he could say back at his friend._

" _you know?!" Dearka questioned him in a sarcastic tone like Athrun was talking shit with him. "for Pete's sake Athrun ,then why don't you just forget about her?!"_

"_Because I can't, that's why" Athrun shouted. Dearka couldn't see his expression directly but he was fully aware of Athrun's feeling right now. He was desperate and irritated at the same time._

" _No matter how I try , it just always her and to be honest with you , when I got engaged I was thinking about __**Her **__ and how she'll feel about me getting engaged and leaving her!!"_

_Athrun finally talked it all. After keeping it for two years after the war at the messiah , finally talked it all out._

_Silence began to cover the atmosphere once more. After minutes of shouting at each other , after the exchange of words , dead air began to spread all over the place. But again , it didn't last for a long time for it was Dearka that started the conversation again……_

"_So what will you do if you'll get to see her again, you can't just kiss her in front of the people you know." Dearka was speaking with a calmer voice now. But despite being calm he was shocked by Athrun's reply_

"_if I she wishes to, I will" Athrun said while clenching his fist._

"_Athrun, what the- "Dearka was really shocked about Athrun's answer. Knowing him he isn't a person who can bear doing such thing. But right now he was talking a whole new person and as Dearka began to talk again he was cut off by…._

"_Oh there you are" kira joyfully asked them as he opened the door leading to the balcony and saw the two. And from being serious Dearka once again pulled up a joker's face which made the atmosphere experience a great change_

" _kira…" Athrun said to him_

" _I think it's already late so me and the other are planning to go now…" kira said to them and smiled_

" _I think I better go to" Dearka replied too as he was now facing kira together with Athrun. And the three went inside. And soon they went outside the manor as Athrun accompanied them ._

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_**Outside the manor**_

"_I'm sorry, I wasn't able to keep you company tonight" Athrun said apologetically._

"_No, were the ones who should be sorry. It was already late but we still went to your house." Lacus replied_

_But Athrun was not the type of person that could pretend that he's okay and as his friends start to walk away from the manor , meyrin looked back at him and saw a very serious Athrun that made her run back at him and say , " Athrun is everything alright?" with a worries tone._

_Athrun suddenly remembered what he said to Dearka awhile ago at there talk at the balcony and suddenly realized that it was unfair for meyrin if he will do __**"that" **__when he finally gets the chance to meet Cagalli once again. Yes , it was truly unfair for Meyrin but then Athrun didn't regret what he said that caused Dearka to feel like he's a different person while talking with him awhile ago. Athrun was now pitying meyrin for he finally realized the truth that he used her to get over a certain someone but failed and although he used her , she was whole heartedly caring for him , putting him first before herself and sacrificing everything just for him._

_Athrun's pity urged him to lean down and kiss her and as meyrin took notice of this , she closed her eyes and waited until his lips met hers. But while there lips were an inch away , a sudden glimpse of Cagalli popped on Athrun's mind , thus causing him to give meyrin a peck on the cheek instead. He didn't understand but when Cagalli popped out on his mind he realized he couldn't bear to kiss meyrin._

_Meyrin was quite shocked, knowing that she's his fiancée. She wanted to question him but._

"_Everything's fine, you can go home now and take a rest okay" Athrun said with a kind face pulled on him. And with that, with __**only**__ that, meyrin held herself and tried to forget all her insecurities and doubts. _

"_Meyrin, c'mon let's go home!!" lunamaria said, as she was waving her hand to call for her sister._

"_O…okay so I'll see you tomorrow…I guess" meyrin said .as soon as athrun shook his head , meyrin ran towards luna and the other leaving athrun all alone out side in the manor who keeps saying_

" _I'm sorry , I'm so sorry" as if meyrin could hear him._

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_**At PLANTS hotel…**_

_**9:00 pm**_

_Cagalli was focusing on her laptop. Even if it was business or personal , she wanted to keep everything smooth for the meeting. She doesn't want anything to hinder her ways because for sure , the result of the meeting will greatly affect her plans_

_But as she was starting to continue signing on some papers. She didn't realize that she was slowly…_

_Drifting…._

_Drifting…_

_And drifting…_

_Into a memory…_

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_**Cagalli's memory( 5 yrs years ago)**_

" _**Cagalli, I introduce to you , your fiancé" , lord Uzumi stated as he gestured Cagalli to meet him**_

" _**Please to meet you, I'm Sky Meitner from PLANTS" the son of Chaiman Meitner , the current chaiman of PLANTS said with a very formal manner. Indeed he was gentleman who came from a great family. With black locks and orbs with the same color as his name and not to mention his sincere smiles. He was surely an angel sent from above and for Cagalli……**_

"_**The pleasures all mine sir. I'm Cagalli Yula Attha form ORB" Cagalli said as she began to realize she got stuck with his orbs. Cagalli wasn't completely sure but she never experience this before, the feeling of happiness with a heart beating as fast as the train. This was all happening so fast making Cagalli blush.**_

"_**Oh please, don't call me sir we're at the same age" Sky told her as he also start to feel something deep inside but keeps ignoring it.**_

"_**Oh so… sorry" Cagalli felt embarrassed and started to feel nervous noticing that her fiancé was staring at her**_

_**Yes, Sky was staring at her making Cagalli froze like ice as she couldn't even look at him straight in the eyes. But while Cagalli was getting nervous and nervous and not to mention blushing, Sky noticed this and unexpectedly……**_

"_**hahahahaha…ha" Sky started to laugh.**_

_**Cagalli was confused at first but soon she also laughed with him and the two laughed upon realizing how stiff there first meeting is. This made their fathers confused but it doesn't matter now for Cagalli and Sky who don't notice the other people around them. This was the first time that Cagalli felt that way , the feeling of being able to laugh as hard as she wants and feeling that she was free even it only just for a short time . But once thing is strange though. A very nice feeling was given to her by an unfamiliar person? This was a question that came from Cagalli's mind but soon vanished they both stopped laughing and sky started to talk.**_

"_**I'm sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable" Sky said to her smiling sincerely at her**_

"_**No it's okay, I'm the one who should be sorry" Cagalli smiled back at him.**_

_**And the two exchange glimpse and found interest on each other until….**_

"_**Cagalli" , her father called in a serious manner**_

"_**ye..yes father", Cagalli replied as she took off her gaze at the guy in front of him and turned to face her father **_

" _**it's a good thing you quite got close knowing that this is your first meeting , but before anything else I'd like to inform you that , you and Sky are going to be as one" lord Uzumi said facing Sky's father.**_

"_**Yes father", Cagalli willingly replied**_

"……_**and this will be done to promote peace within naturals and coordinators. Cagalli are you still listening?!" lord Uzumi asked when he started to notice Cagalli not listening anymore.**_

"_**yes…fa…ther" Cagalli was basically lying with her reply because while his father was talking she couldn't help but notice Sky from the corner of her eye and when she tried to return her gaze to Sky she noticed that……**_

"_**he was staring at me……when have I seen such eyes…" Cagalli' thoughts were suddenly running through her mind until her father noticed this and called for her.**_

"_**Are you sure, you want me to continue?" lord Uzumi asked Cagalli in an unpleasant tone.**_

" …_**uhm" , Cagalli couldn't speak any reply. She was feeling embarrassed now , but fortunately**_

" _**Why yes sir, please proceed.." Sky suddenly replied to the answer**_

_**Lord Uzumi raised his left brow but after a while he continued…**_

"_**as what I have said this marriage is to promote peace within two race , but knowing you two are both young , we will not publicize it for , instead you'll both go into the same institute and study there together for the time being. I do believe we both agreed on that Chairman Meitner?" lord Uzumi said as he was now asking his coordinator friend.**_

" _**yes , I do believe we agreed on that Uzumi , but I won't be pushing it if your daughter herself doesn't want to" sky' s father said. Indeed with his tone and gesture you can actually see that Sky got all his traits from his father. Kind and gentle, that's the best description that can be used to describe Chairman Walter Meitner , the ruler of PLANTS. **_

_**Once again the spotlight was back on Cagalli. She got tongue tied again and this time it was the Chairman turn to do it to her.**_

"_**Oh no sir…I'm willing to do it . If it's for ORB, I'll gratefully marry your son" Cagalli was shocked from what came out of her mouth. She sounded like she was dying to marry his son and she was sounding desperate when she said it.**_

"_**Uhm…uh…that's if you're son also agrees with it" Cagalli tried to take back her words but ended up being stared at again with the three gentlemen around her.**_

"_**!", Cagalli noticed the chairman laugh just like what Sky did lately , but it wasn't an insulting laugh it was like sky's laugh , it was…**_

"_**A laugh that can bring happiness to other huh!" Cagalli whispered to herself as all her embarrassing thoughts and shyness went down to the drain.**_

"_**You don't need to worry lady Cagalli, my son perfectly agrees with the idea, right sky?" chaiman Meitner said**_

"_**Yes, father" sky said while smiling back at Cagalli.**_

"_**and you don't need to be shy , even if its just a peace promoter , when sky and you are already married , you're very much welcome to our family" the chairman continued speaking.**_

_**Cagalli felt really happy that time, she knows exactly what she got herself into and she was perfectly informed about it being only a political activity with no love involved. But somehow with her first meeting she can't help but think that when she agreed at that moment, it wasn't only for Orb's sake, but for someone else.**_

"_**Thank you very much" Cagalli said very much pleased thinking that the conversation was over but then….**_

_**Sky suddenly walked up to her…closer …closer and said...**_

"_**Would you accept me as you're fiancé my lady?" he said as he reached his hand on her with a smile on his face.**_

_**Cagalli was shocked by the sudden gesture and quite hesitant at first . but soon she put her hand over his palm and he kissed it with respect.**_

" _**I accept"..**_

_**End of memory**_

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_**Back to reality**_

_A tear from Cagalli's amber orbs suddenly flowed to her cheeks as she was still staring blankly. The lady she remembers from that time has long blond hair that shines like the sun, always happy and never vengeful, sincere and was never dishonest. Yes , that lady was Cagalli , but she was different now. Still blond hair but not long and it was never the sun anymore. She was now unhappy and urges revenge._

"_!" Cagalli suddenly went back to her senses as she heard her phone on the desk ring and an unfamiliar no. began to appear. She answered it…_

"_Hello, Cagalli attha of ORB, may I help you?" she said as an introduction_

" _So you don't even remember me? I thought I need not introduce myself" the man on the phone replied to him formal but proud manner signaling Cagalli that she was a person she knew very well._

_Cagalli knew the owner of the voice was and it gave her a sly smile on the lips. She perfectly knows who he is for he was one of her allies in her game called "revenge" _

"_Oh so it's you then…I haven't got any contact with you for awhile now Albert Meitner or should I say, __**Gilbert Dullindal**__?! ……"_

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_Okay……so here's another one of my flashbacks. And for the others out their…yes, gilbert Dullindal is still alive after the war in messiah and his real name is Albert Meitner in my fic…wanna know why?...then wait for my future upadates of course!_

_Thank you very much and continue to RR!!_


	4. when selfishness becomes right

-1**Hi there , again I'm here for my update…….sorry it was late but I changed the fonts as you request….so enough about my excuses here it goes**

**Oh and before I forgot…….**

_**I don't own gundam seed and destiny !!!!!**_

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Dearka's house

2:30 a.m.

"!!!!"

"hmmm…?" dearka murmured as he woke up by the sound of his cellphone. Silence was hovering in his room but as he answered it

" damn dearka , how are you gonna keep me waiting for you to answer?" an angry voice was heard in his phone. But he wasn't surprised for he knows the person whom he's talking to.

" oh Yzak! Zup?" he said in a weak tone due to waking up from a deep slumber

"don't just 'zup' me . I'm here to talk to you asshole" once again it was an angry reply coming from a phone

"oh talk to me? You woke me up to talk to me?" it was a really dumb answer , surely now dearka is joking.

He was ready to receive an insult from the man on the phone……..but no reply came . It was a signal that it was about something serious like making one wrong move and death will surely come next

Yzak had enough of arguing the matter. He couldn't find the energy to argue with him after receiving the news.

"'sigh' ………..dearka come to the headquarters tom. After the meeting I have something important to tell you about plants"

"o..okay. Bye" he replied and hung up

The moment of silence was once again reigning in his room. He wasn't thinking about what yzak said yet his mind was occupied with a conversation …….

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_Flashback …._

_(chapter 3)_

"_if I she wishes to, I will" Athrun said while clenching his fist._

"_Athrun, what the- "Dearka was really shocked about Athrun's answer. Knowing him he isn't a person who can bear doing such thing. But right now he was talking a whole new person and as Dearka began to talk again he was cut off by…………_

_End of flashback_

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" if you would do that, a close person's heart will shatter to pieces , athrun" Athrun's words occupied dearka's mind. His friend's last words made him realize that athrun had changed but he wasn't sure if it's for the good or worse. He rubbed his face using his palm and unnoticeably went back to sleep

"_if I she wishes to, I will __**give up everything and leave Meyrin to be with Cagalli in ORB and I won't turn back even if someone gets hurt**__" Athrun said while clenching his fist._

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PLANTS hotel

"sigh"

Cagalli released after remembering her conversation with dullindal. Closing her eyes and opening it once again . Her face was now back to normal , the same angelic face that she wears to show to her people , the same face that vanished together with her love five years ago.

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Kisaka's room

" kisaka!" cagalli called him out

"cagalli , it's late what are you doing here?" kisaka looked at her like he saw a murderer in front him which cagalli noticed and couldn't helped but ask about it.

" you seem scared? I'm not gonna eat you!" cagalli teased him but kisaka didn't have a change of expression. He was really scared to death but cagalli didn't even have a hint why.

As she begun to wonder she noticed a recorded phonecall on kisaka phone. Cagalli without even having a second thought went near it to hear the conversation

"cagalli don't!!" kisaka shouted but he was late. Cagalli had pressed the button , the phone started to process the conversation and the reason why kisaka got frightened to death was revealed to cagalli

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_start of phone conversation_

"_Hello, Cagalli attha of ORB, may I help you?" she said as an introduction_

" _So you don't even remember me? I thought I need not introduce myself" the man on the phone replied to him formal but proud manner signaling Cagalli that she was a person she knew very well._

_Cagalli knew the owner of the voice was and it gave her a sly smile on the lips. She perfectly knows who he is for he was one of her allies in her game called "revenge" _

"_Oh so it's you then…I haven't got any contact with you for awhile now Albert Meitner or should I say, __**Gilbert Dullindal**__?! ……"_

……………………..

" _I didn't know you still exist , how's life in hell, suits your liking I hope" , Cagalli said in a insulting tone as she perfectly knew that the person that everyone thought to be dead never vanished and was her puppet from the very beginning of her plan._

" _now , now , don't just come asking like that. I thought you'd welcome me with open arms , thinking you were the one who brought to hell , **Cagalli**" the ex plant chairman replied , trying to counter the princess' words_

_Cagalli was frustrated. She knows what he was talking about and given the chance to eliminate him she would really do it with her own hands but then………..she can't She let him live to help her with her plan. Indeed he was suppose to be dead but then revenge is still the very elixir to make the dead rise up from the tomb._

_She had enough of his words that seemed like eternity to her ears and replied_

"_what do you want , could you state your business?"_

"_so , again this is the devil's game , I wonder….who might the devil be?" the man on the phone replied saying it sarcastically_

" _I have always been the devil in this game , there won't be a bloody valentine without me remember?" Cagalli was speaking like a devil right now as she begun to reminisce the fall of j_

_Junius seven from a nuclear attack , the same tragedy that caused Lenore Zala's death._

"_I can't talk to you in here , meet me in januarius" gilbert spoke to her as he started to hung up the phone but then her lips began to move that made his body tremble with her words_

" _remember this…I am the reason that your still alive so if you betray me **again**, I will still be the reason for your death and I'll make sure there'll be no more second chances…"_

_End of conversation_

_-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Cagalli' eyes widened about what she heard. It was her conversation with dullindal . A conversation that has to be strictly private or else cagalli's secret will be revealed.

"ki….kisaka! You….?" cagalli was trembling and started to be anxious of what would happen next

On the other side kisaka was more frightened than before he couldn't believe what cagalli said

. He doesn't how could an angelic woman could kill a whole population mass

" you , is it true you were the mastermind of the bloody valentine tragedy? Huh…**Cagalli?"** kisaka asked her looking straight to her eyes which caused cagalli to back off and avoid his gaze

" is it true , answer me-" he said in a higher tone

"YES!!! I did it I was the one who killed all those people , I provoked the earth forces to use nuclear attacks against plants and I …..I.." tears started falling form her eyes , she couldn't help for hurt was coming over her whole being. It was the time when she had to throw all her pity and conscience to trash for it will only be a hindrance to her plans

Kisaka felt cagalli's hurt but then…"why" he asked as he felt the urge to know the truth. He wanted to know so he could help her. He wanted to know so he will know the next thing to do but- cagalli looked at him straight with tears flowing on her face and spoke

" kisaka……I'm sorry" it was just a sorry which means she couldn't tell him anything. She involved too many people already but she can't forgive herself if kisaka will get involved.

Kisaka got confused. He couldn't understand her so he went back to his cool demeanor and just said with a faking laugh

"I…I know it's that dullindal isn't he it wasn't you. He just……he just provoke you. Okay cagalli don't you worry we'll call the police" he tried to fool himself that it wasn't cagalli's fault but ha can't escape the truth because as he begun to walk out the room to call the police..

"stay right there" cagalli pointed a gun towards him attempting to pull the trigger her hands were not trembling anymore giving her the assurance the she won't hesitate if kisaka would continue….

"cagalli!" kisaka was shocked of what cagalli did that made him stop his movement

" don't do anything that will mess up my plan. I know that you yourself knows the truth dullindal was sky Meitner's relative , he was my pawn from the start and if you continue doing this……….and if you continue doing this….I'll…I'll finish you off" cagalli was serious at this point surely the devil has come over her senses. She doesn't what will happen next so….if she has no way out she'll definitely kill him.

"okay …."

"huh" cagalli wondered

"I won't interfere but only if you answer these two questions" kisaka spoke calmly

Now it was cagalli's turn to be confused….but instead of showing it she confidently answered " and what would that be?"

"are you going to see that bastard in januarius?"

"yes"

" I see. Well then ……" cagalli as now waiting for the second question

" are we , the persons who believed you worth killing just for you plans?"

Cagalli's body trembled. She loved kisaka like a father that's why she doesn't wanna get him involved. The confusion of pointing a loaded gun to kisaka went over her. Really she doesn't wanna kill him but for _**Him**_ , for sky she's willing to exchange everything for him. This gave the her confidence to speak straight to him and say

" yes, even if you're kira I'll still shoot you when the going gets tough" she said in with a sly face

"hah! I see , well good luck then" kisaka walked out off the room leaving cagalli's gun pointing to no one

Cagalli was shocked about his reply. Her emotions were mixed up right now the sly face she made up to fool kisaka that she was serious on killing him turned into a hurtful face as cagalli broke down on the floor letting go of her gun. She was crying and laughing like a fool. She felt pity to herself. She realized how she tried to make a fool out of herself. Pretending to be strong , pretending a good leader , pretending to be kind and the most pretending to love athrun , a Zala.

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Zala manor

Athrun was busy fixing the things for the meeting tomorrow. He can't help but be excited not for the meeting but in seeing her cagalli

" tomorrows the day I'll be seeing you again….." he said in his mind as he put his gaze on his window

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Okay so that's my fourth update …sorry it was late I know it's quite short and less asucaga but it has lots of revelations in it and if you get confused just read my last chapters you'll find the answers there…..R&R


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